George probably was entertained by the shear terror in my eyes as I realized I was feeding a vegan’s child bacon… That’s what’s even more hilarious, it was canadian bacon. Wasn’t even American.
– My MotherThe Boy Least Likely To - “Be Gentle With Me”
Staring up into the solar system,
All the stars are fixed up in the sky.
I just want to sparkle for a moment
Before I just fizzle out and die.
I’m happy because I’m stupid.
Scared of spiders, scared of flying.
If I wasn’t so happy,
I wouldn’t be so scared of dying.
My first few moments being 17:
- Breathing into a machine - practically ODing on my medication hoping my lungs will open up enough to not require hospitalization.
- A gushing nosebleed because I’ve been crying: half because someone upset me and half because I’m scared I have pneumonia. (Slight Fever, Had h1n1 again, Have been coughing for two weeks.)
- Headache - probably from the fever.
- General aches all over.
- Realized I’ll never be 16 again.
- I want to be 15 again.
- I’ve been stuck in bed for probably a month now - for different reasons.
Wow, 17, you’re great.
Good thing:
- Chris Walla’s 34 and I’m 17? For now, he’s twice my age!
Last birthday was so much better, I skipped school and played SORRY all day with Jesse Golden and my mom made chocolate chip cheesecake, and Evan gave me the best present I will ever get. Oh well, 16, you were good.
So basically, I’m giving up my dreams of becoming a Ph.D and graduate from University of Washington. I’m not going to be a psychiatrist. I’m not going to work for CPS. I’m not going to do anything good for the mental state of anyone in the world.
Except, of course, for this man.
I’m going to move down a state to Portland, Oregon to follow my ridiculous dreams of becoming a musician, I’m almost half there: I can sing and play guitar fairly well. Christopher Walla will just happen to be in the bar I’m playing at and despite our 17 year difference, we’re going to get married and be a pop duo.
That is my dream.
Please excuse me while I write cute little songs to serenade him with and stare at his pictures on google images and change my blog name to “FuckYeahChrisWalla”.
About Me
Hello, I'm Hayley. I'm sixteen. I'm from Seattle. Some useless facts about me: I always have a boyfriend, I play a couple instruments, I really, really like music, I take a lot of pictures, I think I'm clever when I've managed to organize something, I spend more time thinking about doing things than actually doing them, I wish I had a cat, I smoke a fair amount of pot, I am a walking health problem, I don't really have any friends, I like playing with words, I think parks and gay rights are important, if I were to put my cellphone number[12064844869] here, no one would call it or text it. Lastly, I find it necessary to end things I'm saying with, "The End". The End.
